I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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