I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
