Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Dicks are not precious.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
