I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
