she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
