Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Randomize
