Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
