My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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