omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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