Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
