my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
