The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
