Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize