My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
