are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Randomize