I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I want to have your abortion
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
