I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
