he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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