butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
