I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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