I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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