I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
What a dumb baby whore.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
