I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
