hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Randomize
