But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize