Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
please don't ironically join a cult
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