yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
