i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Randomize
