real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
