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• (740): View more from Ohio

  Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.

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• (607): View more from New York

  How was dinner with ur grandparents?

  (1-607): View more from New York

  I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."

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• (718): View more from New York

  You don't think I'm weird or immature right?

  (917): View more from New York City

  No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets

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• (760): View more from California

  I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"

  (760): View more from California

  When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"

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• (315): View more from New York

  So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?

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• (845): View more from New York

  Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.

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• (813): View more from Florida

  We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.

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• (778): View more from British Columbia

  DOWN HORMONES. BACK.

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  My butt remains clenched, sir.

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