you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Randomize
