She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
