You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
