aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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