At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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