Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Acid is not a monday night drug
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
