If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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