New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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