what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
