so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I am one with the molecules
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
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