so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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