dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
