Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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