Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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