in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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