I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
