Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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