I cockslap morals
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
