A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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