doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
